How are You BEING Today?

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Mary J. Lore How are You BEING Today?As I reflected on the recent Labor Day holiday, I realized that we have become a nation of laborers.

We love to labor. We are busy, busy, busy, doing, doing, doing.

When we face a big challenge or a difficult situation, we labor. We cancel vacation, skip lunch, work through the weekend, and stay late to fix the problem, put out the fire, accomplish the result.

To succeed, we labor. We struggle, strive, do whatever it takes. We put in the hours, persevere, expend blood, sweat, and tears-no pain no gain!

Our heads are filled with what we need to, have to, should, and must do. We do things to force ourselves to get motivated. We even go into labor when we are giving birth to our children!

In my Managing Thought® workshops on Inspired Leadership, I ask everyone to think of the best and worst leaders they have ever worked with and what about these leaders made them the best and worst.

The big aha! is that nothing on these lists is about doing. It’s all about being:

Being of service.
Being honest, sincere, humble, trusting, consistent.
Being thoughtful, caring, compassionate.
Being thankful, appreciative, giving, and forgiving.
Being open, receptive, adaptable, curious.
Being a teacher and a continuous learner.
Being energetic, optimistic, fun.
Being on purpose, intentional, inspired, and inspiring.

It’s about BEING a leader.

As a nation, we tend to do in order to become. We have practiced and mastered believing that doing, motivating, forcing – laboring – brings results. It doesn’t. It brings linear, less than 10%, kind of changes, short-term results. And we find ourselves stressed, ill, unhappy, and uninspired.

Being brings step-function changes, profound change, significant and long-term results. And we find ourselves happy, healthy, and energized.

When we are being, we focus on being who we are and what we truly wish to create in any moment. The ideas on how to BE and what we could create naturally follow, naturally flow. Our channels are open, our minds are clear, and remarkable things start to happen.

We start being our highest vision of ourselves. We notice the difference we are making. Our work becomes effortless and we become energized because our decisions and actions are inspired.

Many of us do in order to become – at some time in the future.

When I am being, I am being what I am becoming-right now. I AM my highest vision, I AM inspired, I AM whatever I am choosing to become  right NOW-in this moment and in this moment and in this moment.

Stuff happens all day long. In every moment I have the opportunity to BE what I am becoming.No matter what has happened or is happening. I have the power to pause, take a breath, and wonder how I could BE a leader right now, BE a parent, BE a friend, BE of service, BE thankful, BE happy, BE healthy, BE the change I wish to see in the world…BE whatever I choose to BE.

I invite you to notice when you are operating from a love of labor-when you are busy doing, in a state of fear and force, trying to motivate yourself or others, in the need to/have to/must mode.

Change it to a labor of love and inspiration. Take a breath (perhaps several breaths) and wonder:

  • How can I BE my highest vision right now?
  • What can I create from this?
  • How could I be of highest service right now?
  • How could I help?
  • How could I demonstrate love and ignite inspiration?

Then take some time to be quiet. Take a walk, get some fresh air, exercise, do what you enjoy and WONDER.

We all have the ability to wonder and get our answers.

What’s your M.O.? Love of labor or labor of love? Being or Doing?

How are you BEING today?

© 2014 Mary J. Lore and Managing Thought LLC All rights reserved.

How Many Lessons on the Power of Thought Can You Find in this Video?

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Get Service

This little video is chock full of lessons on the power of thought.

How many can you find?

 

Shout out to Melanie Waxman–writer, chef, and macrobiotic teacher extraordinaire– for bringing this to my attention. Thanks to Fellowship Bible Church of Little Rock Arkansas for copyrighting this video in 2005 and sharing it with us.

© 2011 Mary J. Lore and Managing Thought LLC All rights reserved.

Changing Overwhelm to Wonder

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This blog is the second in a series of reflections on the lessons in Managing Thought during the recent sudden move of my parents—lessons that apply equally to the big changes and challenges we face every day at work and in life.

When my 85-year old father learned he had three weeks to move out of his house of forty years, he was paralyzed. Recovering from two minor strokes, caring for his wife, my mom, suffering from dementia, living in a house with forty years’ and four children’s worth of stuff, it’s not surprising he was overwhelmed.

When he asked me to help, I wasn’t surprised when my brain also bombarded me with thoughts of overwhelm. I deeply exhaled, invoked the state of wonder and asked myself, What can I say or do in this moment to help my dad? Out popped Lao-Tzu’s wise words, The journey of a thousand miles begins in a single step, and together we decided to take this journey of a thousand miles one step at a time.

I then wondered, What could the first step be? Out popped the wise words of Confucius – To put the world right in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order, we must first put the family in order; to put the family in order, we must first cultivate our personal life.

So I suggested he start with his bedroom.  He went through his drawers and closets and desk, and removed what was to be discarded, donated or sold. When his room was in order, he woke up in the morning and went to sleep at night with the constant reminder of the completion of that first step. He breathed out a sigh of relief, breathed in the power of his accomplishment and felt empowered to take the next step.

When something happens that is different from what we expect or believe or concluded from past experiences, our brains present us with fight, flight or freeze thoughts. Thoughts of overwhelm, paralysis, avoidance, anxiety, fear, this can’t be done, and worry, for example, are all fight, flight and freeze thoughts. When we re-invoke the state of wonder, we receive answers that move us powerfully from fight, flight or freeze in a direction that serves our purpose.

We don’t suddenly accomplish a huge undertaking, we accomplish it in steps.  And when we acknowledge and celebrate the accomplishment of each step, no matter how small, we become inspired and invoke a power within to envision and accomplish the next step. Often, it’s helpful to start with something small that’s highly visible so we are constantly reminded of and celebrating the accomplishment of our first step and subsequent progress. In doing so, we become inspired and wonder what the next steps could be.

My Dad very simply and powerfully, with a bright smile and a twinkle in his eye, said, “Okay, Mare, what’s next?”

What huge undertaking overwhelms you? What one step could you take? How can you celebrate your progress? How can you turn overwhelm into wonder?

© 2011 Mary J. Lore and Managing Thought LLC All rights reserved.

Asking for Help

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This last month, I’ve been helping my parents move from their home of forty years to an apartment in a retirement community.

When the Keller-Williams realtor announced we had a buyer who wanted to close and take possession in less than three weeks, my father was stunned. Although he wanted to move for several years, he was dreading it—he’s 85 years old, recovering from two minor strokes, his wife suffering from dementia, a house with forty years’ and four children’s worth of stuff and so much to plan and do. He was overwhelmed. He had no idea where to start or how to start.

I so admire his first action – he asked for help. Many of us believe that asking for help is a sign of a weakness. Many of us expect others to help. Sincerely asking for help is not a sign of weakness or a show of force. It is a gift—a wonderful gift to ourselves and others. We receive help and we give others the opportunity to be inspired and experience their true nature.

My father asked for my help. In return he received my help AND he gave me the gift, the honor, and opportunity to be of service to my parents, make a difference in their lives, express my love and be loved, and deepen our relationship.

How we feel and what we experience depends on our focus, on what we choose to think in each moment. Had my father remained focused on fear, overwhelm and beliefs about asking for help and weakness, we would have missed the opportunity to experience the joy of life and some very special moments.

As I reflect on the entire process, I find it rich with experiences and lessons in Managing Thought, such as this. I look forward to sharing these with you in my upcoming blogs.

How can you ask for help? At work? In life?

© 2011 Mary J. Lore and Managing Thought LLC All rights reserved.

The Super Bowl Inspires a Lesson in Managing Thought

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Super Bowl Inspires Lessons in Managing ThoughtIn January of 2010 I was in Indianapolis to share my Managing Thought® workshop with a group of Vistage CEOs. Usually, I start my presentation right away. This time, another speaker was scheduled before me and I was invited to sit in.

We all listened intently to Allison Melangton, the CEO of the 2012 Indianapolis Super Bowl Host Committee, as she walked us through the process to bring the event to a successful reality. We were amazed at the enormity of the project and that it would be put into play by only fifteen employees with the help of thousands of volunteers.

We were also impressed that Allison and her team had developed some pretty creative solutions to overcome obstacles and meet challenges, with outcomes that truly benefited the city, its communities, and its citizens – of all ages and walks of life.

As I listened, I realized that this is a success story in Managing Thought.

In my book and workshops, I talk about how, when we know we know who we truly are and what we truly want, invoke a sense of wonder, and practice thankfulness, remarkable things happen. We are able to access our highest awareness and creativity. Ideas flow easily. Goals and action plans pop out crystal clear for us to see. Because these goals come from within and are aligned with who we truly are and what we truly want, we are inspired. When we are inspired we know what to do next and how to do it. We are energized and in the zone (that’s Super Bowl talk!)

From a Managing Thought perspective, these creative and purposeful solutions presented themselves to Allison and her team because they had decided what they truly wanted. It wasn’t just to host the Super Bowl in Indianapolis. They determined the essence of what they wanted – their purpose – to utilize every resource, human and otherwise, and every dollar generated from the Super Bowl to benefit the community, long-term and short-term. And they are truly thankful for the opportunity to do so.

When an obstacle arose, they didn’t blame anyone or act like victims. Instead, they invoked the sense of wonder to find their answers. And because they established vision and purpose and were thankful for the opportunity, the ideas that flowed brought answers to their questions AND fulfilled their purpose.

Several CEOs remarked that they would NEVER want Allison’s job and asked what kept her so energized and enthusiastic. Her eyes and face lit up even more when she shared that what brought her joy was the difference that the Super Bowl would make on the kids, particularly the disadvantaged kids, in Indianapolis. She proceeded to describe the myriad of ways, pre- and post-event, short term and long term, that the Super Bowl would impact the lives of these kids.

Allison knows who she is and what she truly wants. As a result, her goals come from within and she is inspired. Her creativity abounds. She knows what to do next and how to do it. She’s energized and happy. She is invoking her light and making a difference. And I am inspired.

 

For more on this topic and how to manage your thoughts in everyday circumstances and how to deal with the challenges you face in practicing self-awareness and being on purpose, Click Here.

If you’d like to help Mary teach millions of people how to change their thoughts and their lives, go to www.managingthought.com/PBSPledgeSpecial.

© 2010-2012 Mary J. Lore and Managing Thought LLC All rights reserved.