To me, digging through receipts and tax papers is a form of reflection. The receipts and papers are key indicators as to how I’ve focused my time, energy, and money.
Each year, I gather receipts and papers to prepare of my parents’ tax return. In prior years, this process was a no-brainer for me. For years, my parents had pretty much been living each day like they did yesterday. Last year’s receipts and papers presented a much different picture.
There were receipts for prescriptions to calm my mom, so my dad could care for her in their home for as long as possible.
There were receipts for home daycare for my mom, who suffers from dementia, so my dad could run errands, visit with his buddy, and not have to worry about leaving my mom alone or being gone too long.
There were no receipts for lawn care, home maintenance, and repairs. There was paperwork for the sale of their home of 40 years and their move to the senior community so they could focus their time and energy on what matters.
There were receipts for ambulance and hospital stays for my dad who suffered his third stroke because he did not make caring for himself a priority.
There were receipts to move my mom to a new home she shares with other folks who also suffer from dementia and the move of my dad to a 1 bedroom apartment in independent living — all on the same campus. There were receipts for blood sugar test kits, Depends, and natural foods because my dad stopped thinking that he didn’t want to die and started thinking he wanted to live — be happy and healthy, taking care of himself, doing things he loved to do, so he could take care of mom and enjoy their time together.
There were less receipts for medications for my mom who is thriving in her new home where she feels safe and loved.
There were receipts for donations to their church and many other charities because they have always given to those less fortunate.
There were receipts from the bulk food store — for almond bark which my mom loves and my dad buys as a special treat for her.
There were receipts from the Henry Ford and Bob Evans restaurant — where my dad took his grandson who came to visit from Arizona.
There were receipts for a road trip my dad and I took to visit his grandchildren who were vacationing on the west side of the state.
There were receipts for guitar strings and art supplies — because my dad started playing his guitar and painting again.
There were receipts for the sale of my dad’s car — because my dad decided to practice “safety first!” and utilize a transportation service.
There were receipts for the cable company — because he can watch the war channel and the western channel with his buddy and record movies to watch with me on movie night — our weekend tradition.
These receipts and papers — if I just looked at them as numbers — then I’d be focusing on the “doing.” When I look at the essence, I am focused on the “being.”
I can see and celebrate the intentions we set and fulfilled; the values my dad, mom, and I embody; the obstacles we faced and overcame; the sense of purpose we restored, and how we accomplished so much more than we gave ourselves credit for. I could appreciate each moment, and the flow and process of life.
It’s my intention to make every receipt count, to make every moment count.
Do your receipts reflect your intentions for your life and work? Are you focused on what you want? Are you focused on what matters?
For more on handling life transitions, click here.
© 2013 Mary J. Lore and Managing Thought LLC All rights reserved.
I was enjoying a rare day at home, working in my jammies, when I got the news that a man I worked with for over ten years had died. His service was starting in just 45 minutes, so I quickly dressed, jumped in the car, and made it just in time.
My cousin Bernie died. He was 69 years old. Thirty three years ago, the doctors said he had six months to live. When he was a child, the doctors said he wouldn’t live past twenty one.
I remember when I first heard Martin Luther King, Jr.’s “I Have a Dream” speech. Even though I was a young girl, it had quite an impact on me. I didn’t blink. I got the chills. I knew I was hearing something very powerful. I remember looking forward to being an adult and being able to fully grasp what I had just heard.
The word “Solstice” is rooted in two Latin words: sol meaning “sun” and sistere meaning “to stand still” because it appears as though the sun and moon stop moving across the sky. To me, celebrating the solstice serves as a beautiful reminder that my life is a part of a larger order, always changing, always renewing. So it’s the perfect time for reflection and re-affirmation of what matters most and what I wish to cultivate in my work and in my life.
We learn news of the shootings and deaths of innocent children in Connecticut. We find ourselves filled with all kinds of emotions.
Today is the Anniversary of my marriage to my late husband, Gregg.
Are you self-aware?
It’s been over a year since my mom moved to a home where residents experience memory loss. I am so happy to report that she is thriving. She participates in the daily activities, wins every trivia game, helps out with dishes, laundry, and the care of fellow residents, dances like there’s no tomorrow, and loves to sing. Last week she was in a fashion show. Every afternoon, she has dates with my dad, who lives in the next building. They enjoy holding hands, snuggling, and laughing at dad’s amazing compendium of jokes. My dad is thriving, too. He’s playing guitar again, watching war movies with his buddy, working out everyday, recording his life stories for his grandchildren, enjoying movie night with me, daily afternoons with his sweetheart (my mom!) and the company of everyone he meets. And he gets to see mom interact with others, enjoy herself, and being loved by her fellow residents, which brings the biggest smile to his face.
